How to Receive Feedback

Knowing how to receive feedback is an acquired skill. That’s because it’s natural to become defensive, assign blame or offer excuses for your behavior. When you learn how to respond to constructive criticism the right way, your interactions will look like dialogue instead of arguments…and your relationships will be strengthened in ways you can’t even imagine.



What will you say the next time someone gives you constructive criticism about something you said or did?

“Oh, what a great gift we would have if we could only see ourselves as others see us." - Robert Burns, Scottish poet 

“The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.” - Norman Vincent Peale, American author

“The greatest of all faults is to be conscious of none.” - Thomas Carlyle, British essayist

“A man needs self-acceptance or he can't live with himself; he needs self-criticism or others can't live with him.” - James A. Pike, American minister

VISION - Imagine the Future You Want

When you’re busy trying to complete your daily tasks, it’s hard to think about the future. Taking time to visualize what you want most will give you greater energy and purpose.



What do you want more than anything else? How much time do you spend each day picturing how it looks and how you’ll feel when you have it?

"I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center." - Kurt Vonnegut, American novelist

"Everything's in the mind. That's where it all starts. Knowing what you want is the first step toward getting it." - Mae West, American actress

“We think too small, like the frog at the bottom of the well. He thinks the sky is only as big as the top of the well. If he surfaced, he would have an entirely different view.” - Mao Tse-tung, Chinese political leader

"All successful people, men and women, are big dreamers. They imagine what their future could be, ideal in every respect, and then they work every day toward their distant vision, that goal or purpose." - Brian Tracy, American author

"You can't have a better tomorrow if you are thinking about yesterday all the time." - Charles F. Kettering, American engineer

Lessons about Personal Strengths from Cal Ripken, Jr.

Baseball legend Cal Ripken, Jr., spoke last week-end at the Glazer-Kennedy InfoSummit in Baltimore. What an amazing life story he shared! I was lucky enough to get this photo with him after his talk.

Cal’s 21-year career with the Baltimore Orioles included playing 2,632 consecutive games. That’s nearly 17 straight years without missing a game. An astonishing feat.

What kind of person does it take to achieve that kind of record?

Many rookies asked Cal that same question in his later years. At first he had no idea how to respond, but then he spent time considering the characteristics involved in that achievement. He came up with eight traits someone would need in order to break his record, and his latest book describes them in detail - Get in the Game: 8 Elements of Perseverance That Make the Difference.

Cal covered these eight traits in his presentation to our group and illustrated them with fascinating stories from his career. Here are just two that can make a tremendous difference in your own life…

Be consistent. The accumulation of all the contributions you make on a daily basis are what make you special and even irreplaceable. What habits are you developing that make it easy for you to adapt to change and continue to perform at high levels?

Build physical and mental strength. What are you doing every day to improve your performance? How are you growing your mind and your abilities so you’re able to think through problems and find solutions quickly?

Cal’s talk resonated with me at a deep level because the traits he described are exactly the kinds of personal strengths we’re helping people develop with our new online self-development service, ProStar Coach.

Cal’s last slide summarized his approach to baseball and life. This wisdom may inspire you to take greater risks even when you can’t be certain of the outcome.

“Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure... than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.”  - Theodore Roosevelt

Why Positive Feedback Matters

If you’re like many people, you rarely hear praise about the things you do well. Yet the desire for positive feedback is a deep need of every human being. Learning to focus on the positive and give people genuine, specific feedback will strengthen your relationships in ways you never imagined.



What will you do in the future to give yourself and others positive feedback throughout the day?

“The compliment that helps us on our way is not the one that is shut up in the mind, but the one that is spoken out.” - Mark Twain, American novelist

“Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves.” - James Barrie, Scottish novelist

“Silent gratitude isn't very much use to anyone." - Gertrude Stein, American novelist

“Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.” - Mother Teresa, Indian humanitarian

Learn from Your Experiences

To learn from your experiences, it's important to reflect on what happened – for your successes and mistakes. If you don’t take this important step, you risk repeating mistakes and you may not make the most of your successes. Gaining insights from everything that happens to you will prepare you for greater positive results in the future.



What kinds of questions can you ask yourself after every important event to make sure you take away all the valuable lessons the experience has to offer?

“Good judgment comes from experience. And where does experience come from? Experience comes from bad judgment.” - Mark Twain, American novelist

“It's what you learn after you know it all that counts.” - John Wooden, American college basketball coach

“Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.” - Helen Keller, American author